In this article
- 1 How can a mother win a child custody case?
- 1.1 Work hand to hand with your ex-partner.
- 1.2 You must exercise your parental rights
- 1.3 Remember to share medical information and appointments with the father
- 1.4 In special cases, you should ask for an in-home custody evaluation.
- 1.5 Keep an up-to-date record of everything
- 1.6 Their perception of you is everything
- 2 How can a father get full custody of his child?
- 2.1 Always keep your emotions under control
- 2.2 Try to achieve mediation for the benefit of your children.
- 2.3 A resounding no to using your children as pawns in your legal custody battle.
- 2.4 Don’t seek to have your children “decide” which parent is better.
- 2.5 Save as much as you can
- 2.6 Rely only on your attorney
- 2.7 Stay away from addictions
- 3 Child support Attorney in Washington, D.C.
Last Updated on March 9, 2023 by Carlos Lopez
It is normal after a divorce proceeding to file for child custody and when you do, you expect to win. What does this mean? It means that you must do everything in your power to give the judge the most accurate version of the facts so that he or she can give you custody and care for your children.
For a large percentage of single parents, having physical custody of their children is the most important thing after their separation, even more important than defining issues such as legal custody and child support. Do you know what to do? I am sure that taking into account each of the following aspects will help you obtain full custody of your children.
Remember that I have a great deal of experience in these types of cases and can help you win custody of your children after a separation or if you believe you are in a relationship where there is domestic violence.
For a better understanding, I have put together a list of what you should consider if you are a father seeking custody of your children or if you are a mother seeking full custody of your children.
How can a mother win a child custody case?
Work hand to hand with your ex-partner.
If you are going to win custody of your children, it is very important that you demonstrate to the judge a willingness to work with their father.
For practical purposes, this could be classified as basic co-parenting, but in quite a few cases, child custody can be lost in the event of a proven unwillingness to work with the father.
Remember that you must show the family court that you will cooperate for the happiness and benefit of your child even if you no longer get along with the father.
You must exercise your parental rights
Remember that as a mother, the law gives you parental rights, especially if the judge has given you visitation rights with your children.You should also read:Preparing to attend Family Law Court – 8 points to consider
You should try to spend as much time with them as possible and at the same time, engage in normal, everyday activities, such as schoolwork and chores around the house, not just fun things like going to the movies, bowling with friends, going for a walk in the park, going on rides, or eating out at restaurants.
You must show the judge that you are happy to do all those parenting activities that are not so sophisticated or just for fun.
If you must take your child to the doctor, you should let the father know about it and give him the date and time of the doctor’s appointment. If you have full custody, it would be appropriate for you to ask the doctor if there is a suitable time for the non-custodial parent to attend the appointment.
If this is not possible, you should assure the father that for future medical appointments you will do everything possible so that he can attend and be aware of what happens there with your child.
In special cases, you should ask for an in-home custody evaluation.
If your ex-husband tries to claim that living in your home has negative situations for your child (and thus gain custody), I recommend that you request a home custody evaluation. The visitation they do will be very helpful in winning custody, especially if it goes well.
Don’t forget that a neutral person can best evaluate your home, your life, and your parenting skills so that they can prepare a positive report (for you) that you can take to court.
Keep an up-to-date record of everything
If you believe that your children will not be completely safe with their father, (because he has a history of domestic abuse), my recommendation as a family law attorney is that you should carefully document all of the ones you have with your ex, and also the ones he has with your children.
Now, don’t forget that the father may have the same misgivings about you and may have a similar document (with photos, videos and visitation records) to present to the court.
Their perception of you is everything
Perhaps the hardest thing to understand about wanting custody of your children is that it doesn’t really matter whether what they say about you is true or not; what matters is whether the court (or judge) believes all those claims to be true. It is up to you to present yourself to the court as a competent, caring and loving mother.
My advice: always be on time, dress appropriately for court and demonstrate proper etiquette in front of the judge.You should also read:Service of papers in family law: how to contract it
Don’t forget, perception is everything and if it is good, you can win full custody of your children.
How can a father get full custody of his child?
The first option you have as a father, is to try to reach an friendly agreement of joint custody with the mother of your children; if there is no possibility of this, you have to design an appropriate strategy to protect yourself and your children during the legal process to obtain custody of them.
It is clearly not the best perspective, but many parents have gone through it and that is why I can share with you some very important aspects to keep in mind in order to win:
Always keep your emotions under control
The opposing party during the parental rights process will always seek to make you look bad so it is very important to remain calm at all times before reaching a judge’s ruling. For some judges, remaining in a serene state during the process may indicate that you are qualified to have custody instead of the mother (it does not depend solely on it, but it may help you win the case in the end).
Try to achieve mediation for the benefit of your children.
Keep in mind that it is worth trying for mediation in the custody of your children. Finding a soft spot in your ex-partner’s heart may be one of your best options for getting proper legal custody (and your children can be happy with both parents), since as statistics show, out of every 10 cases, usually 8 are won by women and mothers.
A resounding no to using your children as pawns in your legal custody battle.
You should never use your children as weapons or tools, especially not in a custody battle. Nor should they be brought into the courtroom, much less on the witness stand. Remember that you are helping a child grow up and having such an experience will not make their childhood any more enjoyable.
Again, I recommend that you remain completely calm and not insult, berate or humiliate opposing counsel in front of the children.
Don’t seek to have your children “decide” which parent is better.
Unless it is a case of domestic violence, it is normal for children to want to love both parents equally, so it will never be good to pit one against the other.
My advice is that you should not tell them too much about the legal battle that is taking place, try to give them good memories despite the separation process.
Save as much as you can
As a general rule, a parental rights legal process is usually long and drawn out. Having a good lawyer working on your case can be expensive (and if it’s not an honest lawyer, they will probably want to bill 24 hours a day, so find a lawyer you trust).You should also read:So You Want a Divorce: 5 Steps To Take Now
If your finances allow, you should set up a separate “war chest” for the custody process. So keep a reserve of cash that you will likely need in your legal battle for custody of your children.
Rely only on your attorney
By this I don’t necessarily mean a specific person but also law firms or even websites that can help you understand the legal jargon involved.
One more thing, think like a lawyer: remember that any text message, email or social media post can be discovered and be shown in court. Be very careful and conscious about what you write and to whom you write it.
Stay away from addictions
If you want to get custody of your children, it is very important that you keep control of your life at all times and especially when you are with them.
This implies that you should stay away from alcohol and drugs (and not only while custody is being resolved). This, in addition to helping you make sound decisions, will encourage the judge and the court to believe that you are a responsible parent and will keep your children from these bad habits.
In addition to the above, you should promote sports and physical exercise at home and encourage your children to be a part of it and benefit from those activities. Don’t forget, positive activities will always add up in favor of your case in seeking parental rights to your children.
Child support Attorney in Washington, D.C.
If you are getting divorced and want to win custody of your children, you will need a lawyer with experience and a proven track record to represent you. The team at Lopez Law Firm has years of experience helping people just like you get the results they deserve. Schedule your consultation today!