How can parents win child custody cases? [Full Guide]

Cutout family regarding child-custody and family-law concept
Last Updated on March 9, 2023 by Carlos Lopez

It is normal after a divorce proceeding to file for child custody and when you do, you expect to win. What does this mean? It means that you must do everything in your power to give the judge the most accurate version of the facts so that he or she can give you custody and care for your children.

For a large percentage of single parents, having physical custody of their children is the most important thing after their separation, even more important than defining issues such as legal custody and child support. Do you know what to do? I am sure that taking into account each of the following aspects will help you obtain full custody of your children.

Remember that I have a great deal of experience in these types of cases and can help you win custody of your children after a separation or if you believe you are in a relationship where there is domestic violence.

For a better understanding, I have put together a list of what you should consider if you are a father seeking custody of your children or if you are a mother seeking full custody of your children.

How can a mother win a child custody case?

Work hand to hand with your ex-partner.

If you are going to win custody of your children, it is very important that you demonstrate to the judge a willingness to work with their father.

For practical purposes, this could be classified as basic co-parenting, but in quite a few cases, child custody can be lost in the event of a proven unwillingness to work with the father.

Remember that you must show the family court that you will cooperate for the happiness and benefit of your child even if you no longer get along with the father.

You must exercise your parental rights

Remember that as a mother, the law gives you parental rights, especially if the judge has given you visitation rights with your children.

You should try to spend as much time with them as possible and at the same time, engage in normal, everyday activities, such as schoolwork and chores around the house, not just fun things like going to the movies, bowling with friends, going for a walk in the park, going on rides, or eating out at restaurants.

You must show the judge that you are happy to do all those parenting activities that are not so sophisticated or just for fun.

Remember to share medical information and appointments with the father

If you must take your child to the doctor, you should let the father know about it and give him the date and time of the doctor’s appointment. If you have full custody, it would be appropriate for you to ask the doctor if there is a suitable time for the non-custodial parent to attend the appointment.

If this is not possible, you should assure the father that for future medical appointments you will do everything possible so that he can attend and be aware of what happens there with your child.

In special cases, you should ask for an in-home custody evaluation.

If your ex-husband tries to claim that living in your home has negative situations for your child (and thus gain custody), I recommend that you request a home custody evaluation. The visitation they do will be very helpful in winning custody, especially if it goes well.

Don’t forget that a neutral person can best evaluate your home, your life, and your parenting skills so that they can prepare a positive report (for you) that you can take to court.

Keep an up-to-date record of everything

If you believe that your children will not be completely safe with their father, (because he has a history of domestic abuse), my recommendation as a family law attorney is that you should carefully document all of the ones you have with your ex, and also the ones he has with your children.

Now, don’t forget that the father may have the same misgivings about you and may have a similar document (with photos, videos and visitation records) to present to the court.

Their perception of you is everything

Perhaps the hardest thing to understand about wanting custody of your children is that it doesn’t really matter whether what they say about you is true or not; what matters is whether the court (or judge) believes all those claims to be true. It is up to you to present yourself to the court as a competent, caring and loving mother.

My advice: always be on time, dress appropriately for court and demonstrate proper etiquette in front of the judge.

Don’t forget, perception is everything and if it is good, you can win full custody of your children.

How can a father get full custody of his child?

The first option you have as a father, is to try to reach an friendly agreement of joint custody with the mother of your children; if there is no possibility of this, you have to design an appropriate strategy to protect yourself and your children during the legal process to obtain custody of them.

It is clearly not the best perspective, but many parents have gone through it and that is why I can share with you some very important aspects to keep in mind in order to win:

Always keep your emotions under control

The opposing party during the parental rights process will always seek to make you look bad so it is very important to remain calm at all times before reaching a judge’s ruling. For some judges, remaining in a serene state during the process may indicate that you are qualified to have custody instead of the mother (it does not depend solely on it, but it may help you win the case in the end).

Try to achieve mediation for the benefit of your children.

Keep in mind that it is worth trying for mediation in the custody of your children. Finding a soft spot in your ex-partner’s heart may be one of your best options for getting proper legal custody (and your children can be happy with both parents), since as statistics show, out of every 10 cases, usually 8 are won by women and mothers.

A resounding no to using your children as pawns in your legal custody battle.

You should never use your children as weapons or tools, especially not in a custody battle. Nor should they be brought into the courtroom, much less on the witness stand. Remember that you are helping a child grow up and having such an experience will not make their childhood any more enjoyable.

Again, I recommend that you remain completely calm and not insult, berate or humiliate opposing counsel in front of the children.

Don’t seek to have your children “decide” which parent is better.

Unless it is a case of domestic violence, it is normal for children to want to love both parents equally, so it will never be good to pit one against the other.

My advice is that you should not tell them too much about the legal battle that is taking place, try to give them good memories despite the separation process.

Save as much as you can

As a general rule, a parental rights legal process is usually long and drawn out. Having a good lawyer working on your case can be expensive (and if it’s not an honest lawyer, they will probably want to bill 24 hours a day, so find a lawyer you trust).

If your finances allow, you should set up a separate “war chest” for the custody process. So keep a reserve of cash that you will likely need in your legal battle for custody of your children.

Rely only on your attorney

By this I don’t necessarily mean a specific person but also law firms or even websites that can help you understand the legal jargon involved.

One more thing, think like a lawyer: remember that any text message, email or social media post can be discovered and be shown in court. Be very careful and conscious about what you write and to whom you write it.

Stay away from addictions

If you want to get custody of your children, it is very important that you keep control of your life at all times and especially when you are with them.

This implies that you should stay away from alcohol and drugs (and not only while custody is being resolved). This, in addition to helping you make sound decisions, will encourage the judge and the court to believe that you are a responsible parent and will keep your children from these bad habits.

In addition to the above, you should promote sports and physical exercise at home and encourage your children to be a part of it and benefit from those activities. Don’t forget, positive activities will always add up in favor of your case in seeking parental rights to your children.

Child support Attorney in Washington, D.C.

If you are getting divorced and want to win custody of your children, you will need a lawyer with experience and a proven track record to represent you. The team at Lopez Law Firm has years of experience helping people just like you get the results they deserve. Schedule your consultation today!


  1. Asa Moran says:

    Honestly, I think both parents should have equal chances to win custody. Its not a gender thing.

  2. Ermias says:

    Wow, winning a child custody case sounds like a game. Is there a prize at the end?

    • Giovanni says:

      Seriously? Child custody is not a game, its a serious matter involving the well-being of children. Its about ensuring a safe and nurturing environment. Your comment is insensitive and disrespectful to those going through such difficult situations.

  3. Dominick Klein says:

    Hey everyone, I totally get the importance of parents working together, but what if they cant? 🤷‍♀️

  4. Rosie Hunt says:

    Winning child custody cases? Isnt it about whats best for the child?

    • Lydia says:

      Actually, winning custody cases is about determining whats best for the child. Its not a game, but a serious matter where both parents abilities and circumstances are assessed. The goal is to ensure a safe and nurturing environment, not just to win for the sake of it.

  5. Emely Strickland says:

    Title: The Importance of Putting Kids First in Custody Battles

    Comment: Who needs custody battles when we can all just be parents together? 🌈👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 #CoParentingGoals

  6. Guinevere Trevino says:

    I think its important for parents to prioritize their childs well-being above all else!

    • Mariana Haley says:

      While I understand the sentiment, its unrealistic to expect parents to prioritize their childs well-being above all else. They have their own needs, responsibilities, and limitations. Striking a balance is crucial for their own sanity and for fostering a healthy parent-child relationship.

  7. Jorge says:

    Hey guys, I know its important to work with your ex, but what if theyre unreliable?

    • Zahra says:

      Well, if your ex is unreliable, its probably best to steer clear of any professional involvement. Working with someone who cant be counted on will only lead to frustration and wasted time. Focus on finding reliable partners who can help you succeed.

  8. Mohammad Salas says:

    Hey guys, I think its important for both parents to share medical info and appointments. What do you think?

    • Hayley O’Connor says:

      I completely disagree. Its not about sharing medical info and appointments, its about trusting each parent to make the right decisions for their child. Constantly sharing everything leads to micromanagement and unnecessary conflicts. Let parents have their independence and trust their judgment.

  9. Kellan says:

    Who needs custody battles when we can all just raise a village?

    • Zainab Baxter says:

      Are you serious? Raising a village doesnt guarantee a childs well-being. Custody battles exist for a reason – to ensure the childs best interests are protected. Its not about convenience, its about safeguarding their future.

  10. Royal says:

    Cant believe they didnt mention baking skills as a factor in winning custody! 🧁

  11. Cody Lam says:

    Comment: Honestly, its all about cooperation and putting the child first. Peacefully sharing medical info? Revolutionary!

    • Noemi says:

      Comment: Cooperation? Please! Its sad that something as basic as sharing medical info is considered revolutionary. If parents cant even prioritize their childs well-being, what hope is there for the future?

  12. Astrid says:

    Winning child custody is not about being a mother or father, but about being a responsible parent.

  13. Sergio says:

    Wow, winning child custody battles is no joke! But what if both parents are equally capable? 🤔

    • Bailee Sampson says:

      Well, its not just about capability, is it? The court considers multiple factors, like stability, bond with the child, and whats in their best interest. Sometimes, joint custody is the way to go. But no, its not a simple equation of equal capability.

  14. Isabella says:

    I totally disagree with the idea of working hand in hand with your ex. Its war, people!

    • Michelle Booker says:

      Oh, come on! Its not always war with exes. Working together can actually be mature and beneficial. Putting aside personal issues for a common goal shows growth and resilience. Plus, who knows, it might even lead to some unexpected closure or reconciliation.

  15. Maria Barr says:

    Comment: Well, I think its important for both parents to work together, but what if the father doesnt want to cooperate?

    • Derek Whitaker says:

      Its crucial for both parents to collaborate, but if the father refuses, its a challenging situation. Open communication and compromise are key. Seek mediation or legal advice to find a resolution that ensures the childs well-being.

  16. Alan says:

    Sharing medical information with the father? Yeah right, as if thats gonna happen!

  17. Estrella Doyle says:

    I totally disagree with the idea that parents should work hand in hand with their ex-partner. Thats just unrealistic!

    • Edison Costa says:

      Well, it seems like youve had a bad experience or just love drama. Co-parenting may not be easy, but its not unrealistic. Putting aside differences and focusing on the kids is mature and beneficial for everyone involved.

  18. Johanna says:

    Comment: Honestly, winning child custody shouldnt be about gender. Both parents matter, right? 🤷‍♀️

  19. Penny says:

    Winning child custody is not about being a mother or father, but about being a responsible parent who puts the childs best interests first.

    • Jolie Massey says:

      I couldnt agree more! Its high time we prioritize the well-being of children over outdated gender stereotypes. Being a responsible parent should never be about gender, but about creating a safe and loving environment for our children to thrive.

  20. Adrian says:

    Who needs custody battles when you can just raise your kids on a deserted island? 🏝️

  21. Charli says:

    Hey guys, just read this article on winning child custody cases. Personally, I think its crucial for both parents to work together, even if theyre exes! And sharing medical info with the father? Yeah, thats a no-brainer!

  22. Matthew says:

    Hey, guys! So, do you think its fair for only the mother to have an advantage in child custody cases? 🤔

    • Eliam says:

      Comment: While it may seem unfair, child custody decisions should be based on the best interest of the child, regardless of gender. Both parents should have equal opportunities to prove their ability to provide a loving and stable environment. Lets focus on whats best for the children. 🙌

  23. Dream Barton says:

    Comment: I think its important for parents to focus on whats best for the child, not just winning. #CoParentingGoals

  24. Liliana says:

    Who needs a full guide? Just hire a magician – they always win custody battles!

  25. Judah Aguirre says:

    Winning child custody cases is not about being a mother or father, its about being a responsible parent who puts their childs needs first. Lets focus on that!

    • Sterling Benjamin says:

      Oh please, youre oversimplifying a complex issue. Gender bias in custody cases is a real problem that needs to be addressed. We cant just ignore the fact that fathers often face unfair treatment.

Comments are closed.