9 Tips for Preparing for Your Divorce Deposition

☑ 9 tips for preparing for your divorce deposition
Last Updated on May 27, 2023 by Carlos Lopez

In some divorce proceedings, especially those that have become contentious or that involve a large number of financial assets , you may be asked to sit for a deposition.

A deposition is your sworn, recorded testimony in your divorce case.

In other words, it’s similar to if you would testify in court – and the penalties for knowingly lying are similar – but you’re giving your testimony in a lawyer’s office or somewhere that isn’t a courtroom.

Attorneys use depositions to predict how a testimony would proceed if you were to sit in front of a judge, so you want to do your best to be accurate and truthful.

Preparing for Your divorce deposition

The first step in gearing up for your divorce deposition is to provide all the pertinent facts to your attorney.

Remember, the attorney-client privilege allows you to talk candidly with your lawyer.

Conveying significant information that your attorney may not be privy to, like the deponent’s background details, can be invaluable for their deposition preparation and can guide their line of questioning.

In cases of contentious custody battles or tensions between the deponents, it might be essential for your attorney and the opposing attorney to formulate a strategy to mitigate the strain.

Any potential safety concerns should also be brought to your attorney’s attention so they can take the necessary precautions.

Above all, ensure everyone involved in your deposition answers questions truthfully. Lying during a deposition could have legal repercussions.

2 lawyers giving advice preparing a cliente for hist divorce deposition

If you’re preparing for a deposition in 2023 for your divorce case, here are 9 tips to keep in mind:

Don’t bring new evidence

While big reveals of shocking new evidence may be interesting in courtroom shows, they’re not something that should happen in a real-world court proceeding.

If you have text messages, emails, documents, or other evidence that’s important to your case, make sure you provide them to your attorney as soon as possible, or at least a few days before your scheduled deposition.

This gives your attorney a chance to look them over and, because they’re evidence in your case, send that information on to your spouse’s attorney as well for their review.

Protect Your attorney-client privilege

When answering questions, do not start sentences with “on the advice of my lawyer.”

You have attorney-client privilege when it comes to anything you talk with your attorney about, and if you show your hand about advice your lawyer gave you you’ve just waived that privilege.

Show respect

You may not like your ex, or their attorney, but you cannot show that on your face or in your behavior during your deposition.

Instead, do your best to keep a calm disposition and “poker face,” and respectfully answer questions when you’re asked.

Do not argue with the other attorney, or interrupt them.

Don’t volunteer more information

Answer only the question asked of you, and do not volunteer more information unless your lawyer asks you to.

For example, if you are asked whether you made a specific charge to a joint credit card, simply answer “Yes” or “No.”

Do not then launch into your reasoning for making that charge.

Your lawyer will be able to ask you follow-up questions regarding your reasoning if they think it will be helpful to your case.

By volunteering extra information, you run the risk of giving your ex’s lawyer the upper hand.

Admit when You’re unsure

It’s OK to not remember the correct answer to a question, especially if the answer requires you to recall a specific date, time, or place.

If you do not for sure remember the answer to a question you’re asked, say, “I don’t recall.”

Guessing can only lead to throwing potential doubt on your testimony, which is never a good thing for your case.

Ask for clarification

Sometimes, you may not fully understand the question being asked of you.

Instead of just launching in and answering the question you think you heard, ask the attorney to clarify their question before you proceed.

It’s better to spend a little extra time making sure you fully understand the question than answering the question incorrectly.

Stop & Think

Don’t launch right into your answer as soon as the attorney has finished answering their question.

Even if you’re completely, fully sure that the answer you’re providing is correct, it’s best to pause before you answer.

This pause helps you reduce any potential emotional response that could cloud your answer, and prevents you from speaking out of turn.

Don’t try to fill the silence

Some attorneys love trying to throw witnesses off, so they let silence linger before they ask their next question.

That attorney is banking on you getting uncomfortable and babbling, potentially volunteering new or incriminating information that they can use later.

Yes, a silence can be uncomfortable when you’re in the witness chair, but don’t be tempted to fill the silence.

Once you have finished answering a question, stop speaking and do not begin speaking again until you are asked the next question.

Ignore any attempts to get you to speak further, including a tilted head, raised eyebrows, or pointed stares.


Giving a deposition can be an unnerving experience, especially in an emotionally fraught situation such as a divorce.

It can be difficult to calm yourself and relax when you’re answering questions, but relaxing is essential to a good deposition.

If you’re overly nervous and jumpy during your deposition, your body language could be interpreted as meaning you’re hiding something.

Additionally, your nerves could lead you to overshare information or guess at the answer to a question.

Work with your attorney to prepare thoroughly for your deposition. Before you go in, practice some deep breathing or other relaxation techniques, and do your best to maintain your cool during your deposition.

Anticipating Deposition Questions

One of the most pressing concerns surrounding divorce depositions is the kind of questions the opposing attorney will pose to the deponents.

While the questioning can shift dramatically based on individual cases, here at Lopez Law Firm PLLC, have whipped up a list of frequently touched-on subjects to give you a heads-up on what might come your way.

Financial Matters

In divorce cases, financial details are of paramount importance, particularly when there’s a division of property, assets, and debts.

If there is a suspicion that one or both parties are not being totally honest about their financial situation, a deposition can provide a clearer picture and aid in making critical financial decisions in the case.

Questions regarding income, assets, debts, properties owned by each spouse, and any other elements that can affirm or refute the spouse’s financial situation may come up.

Child Custody

If you have underage children and unresolved child custody issues, the deposition could largely revolve around the children.

Questions might include:

  • Who tends to the children?
  • Where do they attend school?
  • What’s their home life like?
  • How does each parent interact with the children?
  • Are there any special needs the children might have?

Health Conditions

Should your physical or mental health be a point of contention, you might have to answer questions about how your health condition impacts the case.

This could include queries about how your health influences your decision-making ability and care for financial matters or your children.

Recreational Activities

Your personal life is fair game during a deposition. You might have to respond to questions about your hobbies and regular activities.

If you engage in reckless or potentially harmful activities, this could have a bearing on the divorce case.

Be sure to inform your attorney about any recreational activities that might be considered contentious.

Living Arrangements

Your living situation could also be a relevant factor, especially in covenant marriages.

Questions might pertain to the length of time you and your estranged spouse have been living separately or your living plans post-divorce.

This information aids the court in determining whether the living environment will be safe for children, if that’s a concern.

Specific Events and Dates

Any particular events or dates crucial to your divorce case might surface during the deposition. Always be honest and accurate in your responses.

Inconsistencies in accounts given by different deponents might lead to credibility issues for the judge.

Divorce Lawyer in Washington, D.C.

No two divorces are the same. But an experienced divorce attorney on your side can go a long way toward getting the result you deserve.

At Lopez Law Firm, we work side-by-side with you through the whole divorce process, explaining every step of the way. Call today for a consultation!


  1. Kamari Dominguez says:

    Well, I guess its good to know that bringing new evidence is a big no-no during a divorce deposition. 🤔

    • Giovanni Pope says:

      Actually, bringing new evidence during a divorce deposition can be quite beneficial. It provides a fair chance to present all relevant information and ensure a just outcome. Its important to consider the context before making blanket statements.

  2. Sawyer Ibarra says:

    Wow, these tips for a divorce deposition are eye-opening! Who knew about attorney-client privilege? #MindBlown

  3. Moses says:

    Who needs tips for a divorce deposition? Just wing it and see what happens!

  4. Promise says:

    Who needs respect in a divorce deposition? Let the claws come out!

    • Bethany says:

      Wow, its disheartening to see such a callous attitude towards respect in a divorce deposition. Emotional maturity and decency should prevail even in difficult times. Lets strive for empathy and understanding instead of encouraging a toxic battleground.

  5. Diego Ali says:

    Who needs tips for a divorce deposition? Just wing it and hope for the best!

  6. Leroy says:

    Who even needs tips for a divorce deposition? Just wing it, amirite? #nothanks

    • Emmanuel Hamilton says:

      Wow, your ignorance is truly astounding. Divorce depositions are crucial and require careful preparation. If you want to risk your case and potentially lose everything, go ahead and wing it. But dont complain when you end up regretting it. #ignoranceisntbliss

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